Every kiss adventure begins with one kiss. The first one.
First kisses, as in the first time you kiss a person whom you have never kissed, as in a kiss kiss–not a grandma’s peck or baby’s burble, although those are pretty wonderful–but the first kiss with your crush. First kiss with your date. Your new lover. Your new thing or fling or the one that makes you sing. That’s the kiss I’m talking about, oh yeah.
You never get it back, that first kiss. That moment.
Or . . . can you?
Can you make an old kiss new? Make the 1000th kiss feel like the first?
Yes. You. Can.
Do it. Go on a kiss adventure.
Have you been kissing the same person for a few weeks? Years? Decades? And you haven’t had a first kiss in that long? Well . . . you could be missing out. Some people grow bored, feel unattractive, or just too old, and they kiss less. Or kiss little. As in little pecks. Lip pecks or cheek pecks. They’re pecks, people, come on.
Admit it. You have stopped kissing. Don’t. Don’t stop. Maybe don’t go elsewhere, either. I say stick around for the adventure. The kiss adventure. Give it a try.
You don’t need to pack anything or prepare anything. You can head out on this lip sojourn by just talking. About your very first kiss, of course. Even if you’re only a few kisses into the whole deal, relationship deal, whatever it is, talk about it. Ideally with the person with whom you shared that first kiss. But talking is the thing. Tell a friend. Your journal. Kiss talk. Lip talk.
Remember it out loud. In detail. Yes, just do it. It’s the story of that kiss that you are after, both the circumstance that led to it and the physical it became. Recreate it in words. And, in doing so, in all this detailed remembering, I mean the deets, peeps, the deets! You might grow a little nostalgic, or passionate. Or outright horny. Yay! Perfect. Time for the real beans. Time to explore. Oh glorious lips and tongues. It’s time to kiss.
But wait, what if you’re not talkers, you and said newly or historically dedicated partner, or maybe you can’t talk, or won’t, or maybe the cat literally has your tongue. Uh-oh. Then you could write down your remembrance of your first kiss. I know, easy for me to say, right? But hey just think about it, then. Close your eyes, sit together in quiet, and imagine it. How you felt, how it felt. How it smelled and how it tasted. What would it have looked like if someone took a photo. Oh. That first kiss. It’s time.
Kiss. Kiss with the first one fresh on your mind.
Experiment. Go further. This is an adventure! Take the past kiss and bring it smack dab into the now. Kiss!
Touch the roof of their mouth with your tongue. Count their teeth while you’re there. Squint with your lips, stare with your mouth.
You see, don’t leave kissing up to the lips. No, no, no. Think of what you do when you want to see something better, or closer, or more clearly. You put on your glasses. Or squint. Or move closer. You stare. Grab binoculars. There are all kinds of ways to see better.
Imagine binoculars for your lips. While you’re kissing. That’s right.
It’s the same for hearing, when you want to hear something better, you move in closer, you ask the person to move closer to you, you turn up the volume. You have all kinds of tricks and tools to enhance your hearing.
Now, think kissing. Imagine a hearing aid for . . . your . . . lips!
Let your mouth go on an adventure.
Think about dancing. Chances are, you were not a natural. You had to learn, practice, watch, imagine. Try again. Dance when you’re kissing. Kiss dance. Boogie. Shake. Do the pony! Do the hustle. Everything deserves practice. Especially kissing.
And, we all know that everything practiced, and perfected, can always use a refresh. Think of the singer you love who came out with a new album, and it has a new sound. Or the artist you follow who has a new piece. The designer who has a new line or color or theme.
Refresh your kissing. Try this. Touch your partner’s lips with your finger tips, or your elbow tip. Put your eyes to their lips. Give them a butterfly kiss. Flutter your lashes all over their face. Kiss.
Eat bitter foods, then kiss. Oooooh, bah! Americans don’t like bitter. But bitter is fun. Eat a cranberry, no sugar. Coffee, no cream. Arugula, no dressing. Do it. Then kiss. Go on an adventure.
Go somewhere to kiss. Somewhere that you have never kissed before. The garage? The roof? Get in the back seat of the car! Smooch away!
Go somewhere that you go often, but go for a new purpose: To kiss. The vegetable stand. The post office. The dog park. Home Depot: nails and screws. Walgreens: Aisle 9, candy.
Kiss in public.
First kisses are not just for new friends, or crushes, or lovers. First kisses are for the couples who have kissed for fifty years. Or fifty minutes. Make each kiss a first kiss by introducing something new to it.
Let your lips be binoculars. Hearing aids. A massage.
Go on a kiss adventure, and make the 9,823rd kiss, or the 2nd, or the 53rd, the next, or this one, this kiss, make it brand new. Make it the first. It will change your life.
The kiss is
can read all the sex-ed
books you want, but
the kiss is not
a bridge to some-
thing else; the kiss
The kiss is
think about his lips
on yours, his
close you think it
might be your own
but it is his
it just is
The kiss is
or nowhere or
new places or
faces. What would
our faces be
The kiss is
everything it is
language it is
surgery it is
reaping and sowing
at once: birth, death, fire
ice, it is naughty
nice, it is