With all that is going on in the world, thousands upon thousands slammed by earthquakes and volcanoes; forest fires and hurricanes; flooding and tornadoes, and literally slammed, the loss of my cat seems so minimal. My tears seem irrelevant. Each time I call her or miss or or feel the tug of her absence, I grab a bit of perspective, like a dusty tuft of Tilly hair floating across the floor, swallow my sorrow, and move on, repeatedly asking myself: ‘Really, Anne Marie?’ But then it will happen again. Little moments of sad.
Cat lovers, pet owners, they know what I mean. Loss is loss, on one hand, but on the other, the disappearance of a well-loved and really cool cat, compared to losing absolutely everything in one’s life to some raging storm or other natural disaster . . . well, I feel that I should be very quiet about missing this furry friend.
She is quite the pretty kitty, loves sinks, as the photo above indicates, and hates her nap being interrupted by my wanting to clean the sink. Heaven forbid. Even non cat lovers see at least one of her many attributes. She is not a drama cat. Not mean by any stretch of the word. Smart? Well, she does like to sleep in the middle of the street, and that worries us all, but she survived as an outdoor cat in the forest for nearly ten years. Two weeks in the desert and she’s . . . gone. Girl?
Coyotes and foxes, rottweilers and pit bulls, she could outrun them or trick them in Flagstaff. Perhaps there is not a tree tall enough for her to scamper up when chased here in the high desert. Perhaps a hawk or owl found her in said short tree. Perhaps she is curled up and snoozing somewhere checking out her new hood. She is quite the Lounger.
Perhaps, as they say, the cat always comes back. For now, as irrelevant as it seems in light of the tremendous loss so many are experiencing, I just wanted to give her a little public note. Because she is simply Tilly. The coolest cat around. Here’s a film the girls made, just to show you how talented she was (cut and paste the url). Oh, Tilly.
https://www.rianajohnson.com/blame/
And for all those who have lost so so much more than a 10-pound, ten-year-old cat in these last few awful weeks, I am so, so sorry.
p.s. Tilly came back after 3 days. A bit bedraggled and speckled with burrs. She’ll be fine. I wish all others such great fortune.
Tilly in the Sink, by me; Painting of Tilly, by Riana.
pocket poet 
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